Bullieve It. They're bad... And That's Okay.

There's way too much ground to cover between my last legit post and this one. So lets just jump right into business...
Is the current state of the Bulls fun to watch? No. Is it a seemingly endless marathon of pain and unfairness? Yes. We all know the past. We all know the current situation. What we don't know is the future. What does that leave us Bulls fans with? Hope... or in some cases, hopelessness. But please allow me to be one of the first (if not thee first) to say the circumstances of today could very well be the blessings of tomorrow. Hear me out...

Does it blow a pile of moldy donkey dick that Rose got hurt (again)? Yes. Did Chicago have championship aspirations for the other tenants of the Madhouse on Madison this season? Yes. Would Bulls fans make a sacrafice or two to get in Marty McFly's Delorean in an attempt to turn back the hands of time? You damn well better believe it. But lets face it... all that shit is out of our control. So getting back to the point, now we're left pondering the question of what's next? Well I'll tell you what's next. A shitload of promise and hope with a little faith sprinkled in. The promise lies within the (healthy) core of this team: Noah, Butler, Gibson, and Snell. Yes, as in Tony Snell. Trust me on this one. He's a keeper. Just give it a little time. The other three are locked up for a little bit, so there's nothing to consider there. Next is hope. The hope lies within our hopes of the front office. The hope is they do the right things at the right times. By that I mean specifically this season. Luol Deng is only going to increase his trade value this season with Rose being out. His minutes will remain high, he will most likely be the high points leader, and he will be relied on in clutch situations. There's no reason he can't be traded for an already established NBA player or a late first round pick. Now mind you, if the Bulls keep Deng off the books next season, that's nearly $14.3 million available.

(I guess this is the faith section) Next up? Boozer. Everybody wants to hate on Boozer. I, peronally, have no problem keeping him around. Yes, we're are all aware of his lack of his ability to defend and/or jump over a sheet of paper, but he puts up solid numbers and does a lot of solid work off the ball while on offense. I think people just want to hate on him because of the contract. It seems to be the reoccuring theme in Chicago... if you're a stud and you get paid near max money, you're deemed a need-to-be flushed turd after the first season or two of your contract. Getting back to the point, let's just say the Bulls amnesty Boozer. You know what that frees up against the payroll? $16.8 million! Is Boozer bad? No. But is he worth freeing up $16.8 million? I'm sure most would find a way to say 'yes' to that.

Off the top of my head, you know who else is coming off the books for $4 million? Kirk-"it wasn't me"-Hinrich!

Lastly, the Bulls have rights to Nikola Mirotic of Spain, who they could very easily bring over to the NBA next season. If you're not sure who he is, let's just say he's Tony Kukoc times two and then put on steroids.

So let's sum this thang up... The Bulls have a VERY solid core in place with Gibson, Butler, Noah, Snell, (sharp-shooting Dunleavy back next year), a superstar international pick from Spain waiting to come over, a recent NBA MVP chomping at the bit to come back, roughly $35 million in cash to spend, and if this current season goes bad enough, a top draft pick in a deep draft class. (Oh! And I nearly forgot an unprotected, potentially EXTREMELY HIGH draft pick from the Charlotte Bobcats for the Tyrus Thomas 2010 trade) Do things smell like shit right now? Yes. But they also did for Andy Dufresne before he crawled through 500 yards of sewage pipe after spending 19 years in prison, only to earn his freedom from Shawshank and end up living the rest of his days in paradise.

Hello Old Friends

It's been a minute. Please leave a comment below to let me know if you still follow. I'm still alive and am thinking about putting gas in this car and getting it running again. Thanks.


Where do I begin? It's been a looooong time since I've been this emotionally charged from a basketball game. I want to say the last time was Bulls/Celtics first round playoffs with a triple overtime from a few years ago. But that doesn't really compare; because even that series had legit officiating that I couldn't complain about.

This afternoon's game put me (us) through the ringer: excitement, anger, hopefullness, optimism, pessimism, resentment, angst, and ultimately remorse. I'm not one for excuses. In fact, I HATE excuses. But today's game... today's game DEFINITELY warrants excuses. Let me start with the least significant and work my way up to the most...
  • CJ Watson out... That leaves John Lucas as the primary Rose backup. 'Nuff said.
  • Luol Deng..?
You know what? Screw it. I don't need to go through the details. You all saw the game. Bottom line. Cut and Dry. Plain and Simple. Black and white. That game was BULL SHIT!!!!! Even if the Bulls won, I would still say it was a steal. That officiating was unbelievable, practically one-sided, typical NBA favoring the favorite, getting the ratings garbage. Take your fucking pick...The OBVIOUS goaltend that wasn't called on Rose's layup in the first minute of the game. CONSTANT bitching, whining, moaning, complaining on ANY fould called against the heat until they get their way. Putting Rose in instant foul trouble on unwarranted calls. The unknown and unnecessary whistle after Lebron misses both free throws at the end of the game... that resulted in a jump ball that was basically more-less a referree-to-LeBron pass. (Which by the way is illegal. Lebron did not wait for the ball to reach it's highest point to touch the ball). Like I said, I'm not making excuses. I'm telling it how I see it. It seemed like every time the Bulls had a call go their way, the refs turned around and gave one to the Heat because it seemed like they 'owed' them one. Hell, I even predicted the Bulls would lose this game. I have no problem with the Bulls losing (well, yes i do), but it's that they lost on a bunch of bull shit that did nothing but help fuel the ego's of a bunch of overpaid, woe is me, classless clowns who's egos have no more room for any type of inflation. Yes, I know, Derrick Rose missed clutch free throws that could've changed everything. But the moral of the story is, the Bulls did not even have to be in that situation in the first place if it weren't for the officiating.

On one last note, allow me to list just a few more of the things I loathe about the Miami Gofuckyourselves. I mean Heat...
Lebron's Pubic Beard
Dwayne Wade - Sellout
Udonis Haslem. Nothing specific. Just hate him.
Lebron's face after any dunk. He seems to think that if he dunks the ball it's worth 5 points.
Erika Spoelstra's face. My God. That man has a face that NEEDS to be clubbed with a spiked bat.
Lebron James' smile. I feel like I'm looking at the root of all evil in the world every time I see his sly mug.
The Heat's PA announcer. Did he get that job from the make-a-wish foundation?
The Heat fans. Do they even know where they are?
HEY, DID YOU GUYS KNOW THAT LEBRON RODE HIS BICYCLE TO THE GAME TODAY?!?!? That's terrific. He rode his bike to the game then played basketball. TWELVE YEAR OLDS DO THAT EVERY FUCKING DAY IN THE MIDDLE OF SUMMER. What in the world was with the media coverage and that bike. It wasn't Noah's arc. It was a god damn bike!

I'll just stop here. My blood is boiling. I cannot process thoughts clear enough to type it all out in formidable sentences as rage takes over. It is just one feeling of hatred after another after another.

I'll leave by saying this: I would trade the next 15 years' chances of a Cub's World Series for the Bulls to win the Eastern Conference Finals against the Heat, followed by an NBA title.

Thee end. Thanks for playing.

You Heard It From This Guy (::points two thumbs toward self::)

If you’ve already put a nail in the Bull’s coffin, stop reading right now. Go ahead and click the small ‘X’ in the top right portion of your screen. I do not want to hear your crap about how insane, stupid, and ridiculous I am. So just save us both the trouble and turn around. This article is NOT for doubters and disbelievers; it is for the hopeful and optimistic. That said….

Stay with me here…Last night, after Derrick Rose missed the game winner I knew the game was over. I KNEW we could not beat them in overtime. We had our shot both literally and figuratively. Let’s be honest. That game decided the series. So, as predicted, I sat there angry, sad, bummed, and quite frankly crushed as the final horn sounded. I wanted to shatter my TV, with Lebron James’ face. I then went to bed telling myself the series is over, the season is over, and any chance of coming this close to the NBA finals again is a looooooong ways away. It’s a pretty empty feeling. I have nothing else to hold on to. I refuse to watch the Cubs right now. Baseball just isn’t doing it for me these days. I woke up this morning to the appropriately gloomy day feeling equally as gloomy. I attempted to figure out a way to put a positive spin on this whole thing, as a way to get me through this grieving process. I told myself to be grateful they even got this far. Be thankful for the fun ride, and be hopeful for the future. Yesterday our friend, the Chicago Bulls, were buried, and game 6 is the memorial service. Basically it was just a bunch of crap to try to make myself feel better.

Right then and there I had an epiphany. I don’t want to be thankful for the fun ride. I don’t want to be hopeful for the future. I don’t want to have to convince myself to settle for anything less than winning this series. I want to think about one thing, and one thing only: ripping the still-beating, cold, black hearts right out of the Miami Heat’s chest. What better way to do so than by coming back in this series?! Winning this series will be the one of the greatest moments in my entire sport watching life. With this in mind, I decided I’m going for it. I’m doing something I have NEVER done before. I’m rooting for this series with my heart and not with my head. I am totally investing my everything into this thing. When a team is down 3-1 and I hear people say, “It’s not over.”, “There’s still a chance.”, “You never know.”, and all that other optimistic garbage, I want to take a 7 iron to the back of his or her skull. But today I am one of those people. I don’t think I’m completely off my rocker either. Here’s why…

Did you forget about game 1? Did you forget about the bitch-slap the Bulls handed the Heat in that first game? Did you forget in both game 2 and game 3 the Bulls played absolutely terrible and still were in it until mid-way through the 4th quarter? Did you forget that the Bulls were one single shot away from tying this series up at 2 games apiece and sending this back to Chicago with home court advantage regained? Did you forget WE have the MVP, Coach of the Year, and Stacey King? Well, if you forgot all that you need to get back to your assisted living facility.

We’re not going to lose tomorrow. It’s just not going to happen. The Bulls will not let this phenomenal season kamikaze itself on the court of the United Center. (After game 5, Heat 3 Bulls 2). This is where it gets tricky. The Bulls need to pull off a shocker and steal game 6 in Miami. I haven’t done the research, but I believe Miami is 8 and 0 at home this post season. I don’t see them stretching it to 9 and 0. They’re too due for a loss. Am I reaching in the bag here for an excuse for a win? Maybe. But who cares. You can’t have an epic series without winning an epic game, and this will be the one. (After game 6, Heat 3 Bulls 3) Now here we are, back in Chicago. Game SEVEN! Yes sur! GAME SEVEN!!! The most watched sporting event in the world since whatever Ali fight, or whatever lame Superbowl. We will all be leaving work early. We will all have lots of cold beer. We will all be gathered with whatever friend or family member that has the best television. And then it happens. The dynasty begins. Miami will crack under the pressure of blowing a 3-1 series lead, the Bulls will dominate with all their mighty momentum carrying them forward. Korver will finally hit clutch threes like he did all regular season. Noah will own the boards. Boozer will yell so loud in the microphone rim that it will explode. Scalabrine will be mean-muggin’ the TNT cameraman. Derrick Rose is gonna have 32 points, 12 assist, and 5 rebounds, and the list goes on.

Losing is not even a thought right now. I’m not bracing myself for any type of let down. I’m bracing myself for one of the greatest best of 7 series you could possibly bear witness to.  We WILL walk happily into the sunset. (And hey, if I’m wrong….go Cubs?)


Top 10 Reasons the Bulls Will Win It All

Number 10.... Tom Thibedeau has an impossible name. And any man with an impossible name can not be beat.
Number 9.... Chuck Norris jokes can be applied to Omer Asik as well.
Number 8.... Carlos Boozer is the best 'scream into the rim microphone 'player in the East. Make that world.
Number 7.... Kyle Korver's Beiber hair.
Number 6.... If Boozer fouls out, Taj Gibson fouls out, and Kurt Thomas fouls out, Stacey King will suit up wearing a jersey named 'hot sauce' and score points until victory is declared.
Number 5.... The United Center is on the West side.
Number 4.... Derrick Rose is from Englewood. Need I say more?
Number 3.... Keith Bogan's packs heat. Score on him once you get the evil eye. Score on him twice, you get "inadvertantly hurt." Score on him three times, you get a cap in your ass.
Number 2.... Derrick Rose once slam dunked a Volkswagon in 5th grade.
Number 1.... Joakim Noah's pony tail.

Matt Garza? Yes Please!

My very top secret inside sources tell me that the Cubs are very close to aquiring Matt Garza from the Tampa Rays.

"Cubs GM Jim Hendry is working feverishly to acquire Matt Garza from the Rays, according to Bruce Miles of the Daily Herald. The Cubs are getting set to send Chris Archer, Hak-Ju Lee, Brandon Guyer and Robinson Chirinos to Tampa Bay, according to Miles. There may be additional parts to the deal for each team."

I got two words to say to this. DO IT! If the Cubs can land Matt Garza I'll put their rotation up against anybody's in the NL Central. You gotta remember that Garza is comming from the AL East and has been facing the likes of the Yankees and Red Sox for the past few seasons. He would absolutely shred the NL apart. Chris Archer is a hell of a prospect to give up, but I'll be happy to trade away a prospect for an already established starting pitcher. Additionally, Garza is still young and isn't a free agent until after the 2014 season.
So here we are, the stars are aligned, the train has left the station, and yet something tells me Jim Hendry will ruin this. Even if he does miraculously land Garza, Hendry will probably end up slamming his pitching fingers in the limo door. Or perhaps he'll forget to sign the right paperwork, and end up accidentaly trading Garza to Japan's Hiroshima Carp baseball team. Well I must be going now. Stay tuned for updates. Or don't. I don't care. I just write this stuff because I like to practice typing.

Why Did It Have To Be Ronnie And Not This Boob?!?

So far this off-season, Jim Hendry has done a great job doing what he does best: sucking at being a General Manager. Going into the annual winter meetings he has thus far missed out on landing Adrian Gonzalez, took a huge swing and a miss at Adam Dunn, gotten Paul Konerko to laugh at him, watched Lance Berkman sign with a divisional rival, had former starting shortstop/2nd baseman make a mokery of the team, and failed to move any of the bad contracts. There is some good news though!!!! Sleep easy people, Jim Hendry did manage to sign Jeff Baker to a 1 year deal. World Series here we come!

The Cubs are doomed. Plain and simple. I thought perhaps with adding a good first baseman, and a starter to the rotation and they would be fine. Now word on the street is that they are looking at James Loney at first. What a bunch of crap that is. I'd rather just sign Derrek Lee back.  What's worse, is that the Cubs are owned by a man who knows as much about baseball as I do about whale fishing. I'm just going to quit while I'm ahead. If I continued to type about what a worthless piece of garbage Jim Hendry is, I won't have finger prints by days end.